Balance Means We Are One Whole Person
It’s challenging to value someone else when we don’t truly value ourselves. It’s even more challenging to be an excellent communicator at work when we can’t communicate with the people we love at home.
This is why doing our inner work is important and frees us from traps and seductions along the way that we are two people: worker and lifer (add your own personas: parent, child, citizen, volunteer, etc.).
And for some, being a worker may be a top executive at a well-known company, an assistant doing all the coordination work in the background or a barista at multiple coffee shops. And lifer has varying responsibilities and obligations at home.
But in essence, we are not two people; our societal conditioning split us in to two and told us we must attain this mythical work-life balance, which is an impossible task that forces us to chase our tail. For a time, many of us even had two wardrobes; one where we dressed up to go to work until business casual showed up, and another for our home life. We were instructed in every part of our lives on what was appropriate and what was frowned upon.
But few attained this mythical work-life balance as burn out and other stresses appeared in our lives although we sat through hours of talks about how important it was to attain this state of being. But when we truly value our life, what choices can we make for our overall wellbeing as one whole person on a journey of a lifetime?
As someone who used to work around the clock, these were questions that started becoming real for me and many who were also questioning not just how we got here but what was the alternative.
Balance in Harmony
Value is at the heart of everything. When we value ourselves, we can value another. We see the world through the eyes of what is possible with no need to lash out or make a point at someone else’s expense.
What is out of whack today is having value exchange as so many people believe it’s just about money exchanging hands. The Great Questioning is showing us that people are starting to make different choices and it is not all about money; it is about being seen and being valued. And knowing our enough.
Not feeling valued results in a breakdown in relationships and trust. This is why we need to suck less at collaboration because it is a value exchange and when it’s out of balance, conflict arises.
Imagine we had spreadsheets that measured and tracked trust instead of just financials. What would your balance sheet look like?
For me, a lot changed when I began to value myself more. Balanced, heart-centered people began to show up who truly wanted to create together, with deep meaning. And I started forgiving myself more and becoming aware when to cut ties and walk away when things were out of balance.
We don’t really need more experts in a world where everyone is making stuff up. There is no one manual for success or track to chase work-life balance. If the last few years showed us anything, it is that no one knows much of anything. And it’s time to trust, value and truly listen to ourselves and each other.
When we grow, everything and everyone around us grows. Relationships are everything and when trust is broken, it’s an opportunity to reflect on value. At the heart of trusted relationships is a value exchange that can never be measured by money.
Balance isn’t about how much time and energy we devote to each area of our life. It is the harmony that exists between what we say, and do.
Imagining from the Heart
To create, you align your actions with your words.
What actions are you taking—are they unconscious or fully conscious? By examining your thoughts and checking whether they’re aligned (healthy) or misaligned (toxic), you become increasingly conscious of your choices and their impact on your life. You have within you so much that can be released.
Rumi, the thirteenth-century Persian poet, reminds us that ““Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise so I am changing myself.” You choose whether you’re facing opportunities or challenges. You can create peace within yourself or you can war with yourself and those around you.
When you imagine from the heart, you become aware that everything begins with a single thought in your mind. You have the ability, on your own or in a community, to imagine and create the balance and inner peace you need.