The Root of Disappointment
A disappointment is what we experience when things don’t go our way. The noun disappointment comes from the Middle French word disappointer, meaning “undo the appointment,” or “remove from office.” Losing a job or a friend not living up to promises made are disappointing experiences.
And today, disappointment describes anything that crushes our hopes or lets us down. Sometimes disappointment stems because we assume people should know better or act in a different manner. But the truth is, they don’t. Maybe they are scared to be truthful, even with themselves. And in the process, we are disappointed.
When we give with our whole heart, we can be disappointed. We might feel taken advantage of or not appreciated. It’s all part of being human.
But does this mean we should stop giving or simply shift out efforts? Maybe it’s time to become discerning of who we share ourselves with as our energy and hearts are precious?
Because who wants to live a life of disappointment? And what if these disappointments or heartbreaks are actually incredible guides that prepare us for a different type of experience?
Opportunities Are Everywhere
Is it our responsibility to be in charge of our expectations? Maybe giving with a full heart allows us to be discerning about people? And we discover who is here for the long haul with us, and who is simply passing through?
Maybe at the heart of true harmony, there is a higher frequency that allows us to focus on shared value? Perhaps we step out of our own head and know we are here for a greater purpose of creating meaning?
When we are honest with ourselves and no longer live in a world of disappointment, we open ourselves to truly knowing ourselves.
When we do our own inner work, none of this matters any more. Because when we get grounded in reality, we take deep breaths and become aware that this world is not what it seems. And there is another world waiting to be created by us. And no, it’s not a simulation or a video game. It’s an opportunity to put away the hero’s journey and explore and experiment possibilities with our internal GPS.
Pioneers often don’t want to be the first ones at the gate. But by setting out to create something we love, we find ourselves exploring and experimenting on the road less traveled.
Transforming Disappointment to Opportunity
When we connect with people who are in flow of giving and receiving, there are very few disappointments. Margaret Wheatley reminds us that “Relationships are all there is. Everything in the universe only exists because it is in relationship to everything else. Nothing exists in isolation. We have to stop pretending we are individuals that can go it alone.”
Maybe we are meant to expand from the disappointments we encounter on the journey? They guide us to create deeper meaning by cracking the illusion of everything we think we know. And this is how we build our immunity; by no longer needing to be accepted or a victim of other people’s beliefs, judgements and expectations. We no longer star in a soap opera of heroes and villains; navigating the next low or high.
Our highest intentions serve as our guides as we make space for healthy beginnings. And to do so, we must pause, rest and refuel. When we do, we ignite our curiosity and courage to understand that we are the ones we have been waiting for. And not everyone treks with us as we choose healthier paths of creation. When in tune with our highest intentions, our opportunities become wild co-creations.
And there is always hope. My dear friend Rob Southcott believes that “We are in a world of many increasing challenges. But we have what we need to find our way through them in these times of transformative change–each other.”
The choice is ours in how we navigate, who comes with us, what we pack for the journey and how passionate we are about experiencing life to the fullest with curiosity, courage and deep love of ourselves and each other. What if everything is already here to discover and create like never before, today and every day?
In spite of disappointments and heartbreaks, we open ourselves to wild opportunities with newly discovered truth. What if we thrive as we create our paths and flow through these historic times?